Monday, April 28, 2008


All of this biking news is in preparation for a ride that I am doing THIS SATURDAY!! I will be traveling 30 miles with my new clipless pedals. I have confidence, but also know that I will probably topple over at some point.

Many of you reading my blog are riding as well or have already been solicited to donate to the AIDS Alliance NC. But, you haven't already been asked, or even if you have and want to give to me too :) Click Here and then donate under my name.

Here is what you are donating towards:

MISSION: The Alliance of AIDS Services-Carolina mission is to serve people living with HIV/AIDS, their loved ones, caregivers, and communities at large through compassionate and non-judgmental care, prevention, education and advocacy.

WHO WE SERVE: The Alliance serves people with HIV/AIDS and their families through direct services such as providing transportation to medical appointments, providing housing and skilled nursing services, prevention education, faith-based programs, food pantries, counseling and advocacy in Durham, Orange, and Wake Counties communities.


Saturday, April 26, 2008

laughing at myself

I just got back from the bike shop where they put clipless pedals on my bike. I have already learned a ton from this process and know that the learning has just begun.


1) Pedals with clips are actually toe clips so that you can strap you tennis shoe feet into the pedals
2) I have mountain bike cleats on my bike shoes
3) You need a special wrench to change the pedals ** Yesterday I spent 20 minutes trying to remove my old pedals myself and realized that once again, I needed help! Why can't I do it myself?

4) If I'm patient I can figure some things out. I hooked my bike rack on my trunk all by myself! I felt like this was a big accomplishment. Matt is out of town and I worked through all of the directions.

So, now that I'm back from getting the clipless pedals I need to practice getting on and off the bike. I tried several times and crashed in front yard. I figured that I could give my neighbors some good entertainment for their Saturday afternoon. I needed to take a lunch break, but I'll be back at it this afternoon and tomorrow.

Any suggestions on how to make the transition?

Sunday, April 20, 2008

2008 Bravo Awards

All of us who frequent Raleigh have a chance to have our voices heard by voting for our local favorites.

This Survey takes a little bit of thought, but its way fun. Basically, we have until May 15 to pick our top restaurants, shopping spots, sports teams, schools, etc.

Metro Magazine will be running a special on it and these places will get spotlighted and revered from all who find out!

If you need some tips... Choose NoFo for the following categories: Brunch, Eggs Benedict, Bloody Mary, and of course WAIT STAFF!!

Choose Dos Toquitos for: Mexican and Margaritas

Choose High Park Grill for Sports Bar

everything else is up to you! Enjoy ;)

Friday, April 18, 2008

What are we offering?

Last night at home group we had a great conversation! Thanks Jon!!

This morning I had a great conversation with my friend. Thanks George!!

I have been thinking a lot about what the 'gospel' is... then my dad sent me this article.

I don't necessarily ascribe to all of it, but this quote spoke to me:

Rick Richardson in his book Reimagining Evangelism, got it right: "The biggest missing piece in our understanding of the gospel has to do with our angle of vision." A kingdom angle gives an eschatological vision: God breaks into our world through Jesus to set all things right; and we can enter into God's rule by turning to God's way, putting our trust in Jesus, and becoming part of his special (covenant) people.

(I had to look up 'eschatology', if you click on it wikipedia will tell you all about it)

What does that quote say to you?

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Prayer and Perspective

Last week I struggled a lot with doubt, uncertainty, fear, anger, etc. I attribute part of it to having too much time on my hands to think, but a lot of it has to do with the amount of suffering and depravity that I am learning more about in our world and the desire for God to fix it. Another part has to do with really questioning my faith and if, as a Christian, I have something to offer others... what type of hope do I profess? how is my life different because I follow Jesus? For some reason I was having a hard time answering those questions...

I think I lost a little perspective.

Today I sat quietly and reflected on Jeff's message from Sunday. (It was about the Lord's prayer). I only made it through the first line of the prayer and felt a soft whisper just to stay in that moment... Here is where I am:

Our father,

Daddy, you care about me, you desire for me to rest, you want me to curl up in your arms, protection, comfort, peace, love, strength, you wipe my tears, you heal my soul...

"You dance over me, while I am unaware, you sing all around and I never hear a sound. Lord I'm amazed my you..."

Who art in heaven, hallowed be your name.

What in the heck does it mean to be Holy? Can I even conceptualize that?

It took me back to this song.

I reflected on the words for a while. I take comfort in them.

What is your view of God today?

Saturday, April 12, 2008

NC State Cheerleading

This video is from NCA College Nationals in Daytona, FL. The first pyramid is my favorite part of the entire routine.

Last Sunday I got to go see their dress rehearsal and ever since then I have been looking for the video on line. I was so pumped to see how amazing their routine was. Good Job Guys!!

It would be even better if everything hit, but congrats on Third Place.

One of these days we will beat Louisville again!

I have questions

I am reading a book called, 'Grace for the Moment' by Max Lucado. It basically has a bible verse at the top of the page and then a couple short paragraphs of commentary for each day.

I kind of look at this book as one that makes you feel good. Although, there have been some days that have challenged me to look at my life, there are others where I get the warm fuzzies inside while reading it.

I think today was supposed to be one of those warm fuzzy days... but, instead it made me wonder what the real deal is. I have an idea about some of the contributing factors to my questions... but, I would like to get some feedback.

The main point was that when Jesus died on the cross and said, "It is finished." with that went the sting of death and the hurt and pain and suffering in our world... with his grace we are freed and by his wounds we are healed.

Now, I believe this, but I also am wondering... I still feel pain and sorrow when people around me die... I still face sinful patterns in my life... What gives?

My brother posted a video that speaks to the not here yet, but here now kingdom of God... I think this is a bit of the tension and where I find my questions coming from.

Any thoughts?

Friday, April 11, 2008


Sometimes all it takes is someone to notice a small thing that you are doing well and let you know it matters to bring a smile to your face.

I think we all (as humans) seek approval in different ways and want to be validated. A lot of times we only hear when we do something wrong or make a mistake... this can be pretty defeating.

It takes a little effort to notice something positive about those around us and little bit more to point it out.

What would happen if we all started doing that consistently?

Thursday, April 10, 2008


I was hoping to garner some sympathy by posting my blown up face on my blog, but after taking these photos I realized that I don't really look that different than normal.

However, I do feel different! I have this underlying sense of nausea... I want to kick it, but am not sure how... it pushes me back to the pain meds (they are oh so good)! But, I am trying to stay off of them. So far today I've only had two ibuprofen.

Yesterday I had lots of visitors! Thank you friends! I am feeling very special and cared for. But, now I am starting to feel like life should go back to normal, but I'm not quite there yet... this is the hardest place for me to be I think.

So, on to thinking more deep thoughts and maybe doing some ironing.

Wednesday, April 9, 2008

A prayer for all of us

Christ's love is greater than anyone can ever know, but I pray that you will be able to know that love...

Hope, trust, faith, movement...

Tuesday, April 8, 2008


On Thursday and Friday this past week I got to participate in a conference at UNC Chapel Hill that was dealing specifically with combating sexual slavery in North Carolina and internationally.

The first day left me feeling a bit remorseful and overwhelmed (this is my usual process for dealing with big things in life). Then the second day provided a ton of momentum, specific action steps, and hope for the future.

I am energized for several reasons:

*Daniele had a chance to bond and its awesome to work my sister on this project
*Our group is actually making a difference
*We have already made 4 more contacts since the conference with others who are working towards establishing church networks for care and support.
*Newspaper articles like this one.

I am still frustrated and understand the amount of work we have to do because:

*Newspaper articles like this one. Can you tell a difference between the tone and purpose of the articles?
*The lack of coherent ability to identify and support victims
*Our culture (that I am a part of) that perpetuates inaccurate and harmful perspectives on our sexuality.

The following video shows a bit of the problem. Its only 30 seconds and okay for anyone to watch.

There is another video that I may post in the future, but the first time I watched it, I couldn't make it through so, I chose to hold off, although you can watch as many as you would like on the video stream that goes below this one.

Saturday, April 5, 2008

a short break

There is so much going through my mind right now, its hard to know where to start... I have thought a couple times... oh that would be interesting, or this would be interesting; but its too much to consolidate into a post at the moment.

So, I'm taking several days to process.
I know you are all in suspense :)

Wednesday, April 2, 2008

Garlic Butter Sauce

Last night I made dinner for Matt and I. I'm still working on timing with everything getting ready at the same time...

FYI: Chicken takes a long time to bake in the oven.

So, I decided to sautee it to make it go faster, but needed something to use. We had a left over Papa John's garlic butter sauce in the fridge. So, I dumped that in the pan first and then sauteed the chicken in that.

It turned out delicious. Easy, quick, and convenient.

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Asking for Help

I don't like to do it, ask for help that is.

It makes me admit my weaknesses. It requires me to be vulnerable. But for some reason God continues to require me to do so.

This morning I sat down and came to God with the goal of "getting" something from him, in order to help someone else and make them "happy" or "fulfilled".

Then an overwhelming amount of guilt and shame welled up... "Where in the heck did that come from???"... I could not concentrate... so I started to pray... more overwhelmingness, more feelings of inadequacy, more fear, more AHHHHH!!!

I NEED TO TAKE A WALK... (as I was walking I realized...)

Okay, so I need to ask for help.

I called a friend and we prayed. It is amazing how God continues to speak truth to his people through each other. Its amazing how often I need to learn that I can't, nor is it my job, to please everyone.

Thank you friend for praying!
Thank you God for listening!
Thank you Holy Spirit for moving!

Freedom and blessings abound when we listen and respond to what God whispers to our hearts.