God, Our Father

This morning I was sitting there getting ready to have my time with Jesus as usual and wasn't quite sure where I wanted to start... usually that means I pick up my "Grace for the Moment" book because its quick and makes a point that frames my thinking... this is what I did and here is what it said:

[Recently], my daughter Jenna and I spent several days in the old city of Jerusalem... One afternoon, as we were exiting the Jaffa gate, we found ourselves behind an orthodox Jewish family--a father and his three small girls. One of the daughters, perhaps four or five years of age, fell a few steps behind and couldn't see her father. "Abba!" she called to him. He spotted her and immediately extended his hand...

When the signal changed, he led her and her sisters through the intersection. In the middle of the street, he reached down and swung her up into his arms and continued their journey.

Isn't that what we all need? An abba who will hear when we call? Who will take our hand when we are weak? Who will guide us through the hectic intersections of life? Don't we all need an abba who will swing us up into his arms and carry us home? We all need a father.

After I read this, I was thinking... this is so true... but, I have several friends, including myself, who are facing times of uncertainty, trials, pain, and/or fear of what the next steps in life are going to bring...

I started thinking... in these moments I often get caught in the moment between crying out "abba" and God taking my hand. I panic, I wonder, does he still love me? Can he hear me? what if he is busy caring for my sister who is doing something more important? What if I did something wrong and he is mad at me and won't take my hand ever again? What if he is testing me so that I learn never to do this again? How come I walked slower than the rest of my family? Will I ever see them again?

Then I looked back at the story, it says "immediately"... then he led her and her sisters through the intersection... but then it wasn't until the middle that he scooped her up in his arms... again, my mind goes to... DAD! DON'T YOU SEE THE HUGE BUS COMING RIGHT FOR ME?

As I am writing this I am laughing at myself... all of my effort spent on plan B and worrying that God doesn't have it in control... maybe I can start calling out knowing that God is there and is holding my hand...